Home > Sarah Silverman
I am a monkey | 1,993,504 Fans ON FIRE! Chance of Friendship: Dream On! 2.1 Tweets Per Day (TPD) 2.8% Reply Rate 188.1% Link Posting Location: Palestinian Territories + Map |  @SarahKSilverman Official Site | |
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
. @kyledunnigan wants butt sex http://t.co/hTwanx1r
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Loving the Celebrity Apprentice finale! May the best power-bottom win!!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
RIP Robin Gibb. Wish I had gotten that message to him to hold on.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
PERFECTLY SAID by ill Doctrine: http://t.co/gGRo44kG
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Thats ok doll I'm not for everyone RT @shapdogg @SarahKSilverman breitbart website kooks talking poop about u & ur tea party westboro tweet
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Texted my beau this pic of my outfit & this was his response http://t.co/ls6pDSwH
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
It's not my fault if my hair looks better dirty. God obvs has a plan.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
how about "Feed the Poor"? RT @adamsbaldwin &clearly dear @SarahKSilverman the solution 2 our U.S. debt catastrophie is NOT "Eat the Rich"
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
.@adamsbaldwin Re VAWA vid-- that is so obviously an Applebee's integration
(I agree - beautiful speech)
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
:) @adamsbaldwin I don't know ur def of big gov so I can't say. But can we agree that the byproducts of greed & fear sux? xo
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Hi @adamsbaldwin, I agree I'm crude but I also love America. U & I disagree but I like our common ground: we both give a shit
xo
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
The Tea Party really is just a cunt hair away from being the Westboro Baptist Church
-Maya Angelou
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I like when @twittels describes Schrab as someone who "wipes side 2 side"
RT @RobSchrab Yeah!!!!! http://t.co/C7cqaGjB
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Q: Is this My Dad's Aunt Bess or @tobeymaguire's oldentimely pic from Frontierland?
http://t.co/HaNamxtd
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
If you are not for the civil rights of all Americans than you are Un-American. <-- @barackobama, say THAT
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
... It's a man's arm-pussy!!
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! http://t.co/nANFKNRk
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Fun game:
Q: ever look up a lady's kulats? http://t.co/ANTDr35y
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Anyone know a DONALD GRENIER or PAUL SANCLEMENTE? They'd be 76. They bullied my dad in hs & I'm looking 4 them
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Saying "RELAX" is maybe the least relaxing word you can say to someone
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Hey super loud motorcycle man. I don't know who hurt u when u were tiny but ur giving me a heart attack
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Snip out the crotch of your tight & let your vagina breathe, Sweetie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Wait -so Obama felt 'rushed' into supporting gay rights? yuck. I can't wait for @CoryBooker to be president
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
My hero @lizzwinstead 's book is finally out today ya'll!
#LizzFreeOrDie
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
"Your mama's so cool,
She mirrors me in a positive way that makes me feel good"
(Introspective SNAPS)
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
You know how when you get too stoned and you start DMing @TheOnlyEdAsner? Well I do. I do know how when.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
RT @simonsam Why should the Bible's definition of marriage be America's definition?
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I'm finding it hard to get sympathy with my I-pulled-a-muscle-on-a-zip-line story.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
NORTH CAROLINA TODAY!! Vote NO on Amendment One!! Show these barbarians what's what!
#amendmentone
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
NORTH CAROLINA! Vote NO on Amendment One tomorrow!! Show these barbarians what's what!
#amendmentone
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Milk milk lemonade, 'round the corner NOTHING HAPPENS I SWEAR
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
every episode of Mad Men is a masterpiece
#sallydraperforever
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I don't think any comic would disagree that @Joan_Rivers is by far the most hard core comedian on TV
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I bet there are more prolapsed anuses since the invention of the iPhone
#notalibrary
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Looking at amateur porn on my phone at 4:04 pm makes me feel good about myself & my future.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Unfortunate is the man who employs baby talk
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I'm a cereal girl. Anything too fancy gives me diarrhea. That's why I'll never meet the Queen.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Anyone going thru weho on the way downtown to rhe March like right now? W room for me and a ton of signs?
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Loudly say the name Michelle Tuzee. I dare you not to smile.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Great comics on @Amnesty's Secret Policeman's Ball on @EpixHD 2NITE at 11:30pm ET: http://t.co/B9z49HBq #secretball
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Holy crossover! The black smoke monster from #Lost just came out of a lady's vagina in #GameofThrones!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Guys- I hope to see u at the march Saturday--
COME FOR THE PUSSAY
STAY FOR THE JUSTICE! http://t.co/YRQ23jLM
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Fun fact: despite all the dirty tweets I send, the one about this march for Women has received the most hate mail
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
BRING UR DAUGHTERS & SONS!
UNITE AGAINST THE WAR ON WOMEN march this SAT!
Find out where in your state: http://t.co/YRQ23jLM
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Dear Rep & Dem lawmakers; Please please go back to considering the actual bill & not the bill writer.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
"Oh Earth ur too wonderful for anyone to realize! I wish I could scissor the whole world!"
-Thornton Wilderer
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Holy crapload #MadMen blows my mind
#Haveashittyday
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Bros & Sissies- Hope to see u at the UNITE AGAINST THE WAR ON WOMEN march this Saturday! Info:
http://t.co/DZqv9sAP
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Bros & Sissies! Hope to see you all at the UNITE AGAINST THE WAR IN WOMEN on Saturday! Info: http://t.co/0wYJMiYA
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
"walkin' through a fart since the day I been born" -lyric from my imaginary country song
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Techno music hurts & confuses me. The sound of a computer screaming in my ear isn't my cup of tea
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
One thing I love to do when I'm really high is hold babies
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Happy THE KILLING/ MAD MEN/ GAME OF THRONES/ GIRLS/ NURSE JACKIE day everybody!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Hot shit. I had no idea The French Lieutenant's Woman was this way
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Please enjoy my adorable Dad http://t.co/dfjS5GEW
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Check out this great doc about my love, Music Man Murray on @doc_channel 2nite at 8:30!! http://t.co/2zmg111p
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Relax, Dolly. You're the only one Googling you.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I like the score for Game of Thrones. I guess I like the music from that pretend period of time
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
No tone but I can hear the ocean RT @ChelseaVPeretti @SarahKSilverman put your ear up to your b hole
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Piercing high pitched ringing in my bedroom: night 2. Cannot find source.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
The elderly-couple-dying-only-days-apart notion makes my heart physically hurt. I don't enjoy this feeling
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
New bill proposal: Mandatory moment of silence for the millions of dead human sperm in your gym sock
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Couple thoughts: genocide is happening in Sudan & I'm tired lately.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Men that get plastic surgery look like nanas
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
The government should STAY OUT of our PRIVATE LIVES except when it comes to who we marry & what we do w our uteruses!!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
It wasn't funny for me to talk so casually about abortion. But when they take our right to choose away it will be HILARIOUS!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I don't want to look at my naked crotch upside-down through my legs in the mirror. I have to.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
..from other people reading on their iPads that you exist.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Oh modern world you've traded in your beautiful distorted human memory for a fucked up satisfaction
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
They happily trade the real-life interaction for a facebook upload.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
People are straight disappointed if they have to use only their AMAZING HUMAN BRAIN for memories
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I'm pretty easy going. I just don't like noises shapes or sensations
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
This is true & not a euphemism: My dog cries when I have sex.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Really you should only tell people who are tens what their number is.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
I like to think of my nostrils as "big naturals"
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Ooooooh it's Friday the 13th you guys! Fun spooky murdery kinds of things day!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
My Mom once told me my nostrils look like a 2 car garage which I took to mean shoot for the stars
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
What if we definitively found out there's no God or Allah or anything? Would there be more killing or less?
Discuss
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Got a quickie aborsh in case R v W gets overturned http://t.co/HprNm8UO
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Is "Slade" a real-life man's name or is this a practical joke on me?
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Good rule of thumb: only have kids if it's your DREAM to have kids.
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
4/29 at LARGO @aimeemann @kevin_nealon @DanaJGould @DavidSpade &me to benefit 1kid1world http://t.co/ZnBudtc0
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Brenda & Eddie are about 55 now.
#italianrestaurant
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
My sis @LauraJSilverman starts on #NurseJackie tonight, Yo!
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
Jesus was the 1st recipient of the classic goatee gem, "U look like u went down on it & came up with it"
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
AP: Passover, Easter fall on same weekend. Bread doesn't rise, Jesus does
SarahKSilverman
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
We're all just molecules, Cutie.
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